b.realSomething to Think About
by, Aysha Bell, B.Real Mentor
Imagine yourself being totally honest with another person; expressing your successes and even your flaws and failures. Now imagine that person accepting you just as you are, granting you the grace to voice your true heart and then helping you figure out the right direction. And imagine that you are not in a counselor’s office or in a place where you have to pay a fee for this service. How would you feel? What would it look like for you to have the freedom to be who you really are with another person who is not your husband or fiancé but a true friend? Have you ever had a relationship like this? Do you have someone with whom you can practice James 5:16 “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.”
In this day and age as a people we are so consumed with garnering casual acquaintances. Everywhere you go there is some type of seminar that involves networking and other “hands off” personal, professional and even spiritual development principles. This type of interaction is good and beneficial, but I believe God wants more for us that’s beyond superficial, topical relationships. A place where the facade begins to peel away and you can share your life with that person in an open and honest manner.
People are dying from secrets. Depression, addiction, poverty, and more cannot be healed through casual acquaintance. There are few people who would be willing to admit to “real” problems with people around them that they don’t know well and haven’t developed a circle of trust with. Why? Because we want to look good and we (especially as women) want to guard our hearts and lives from gossip. And rightfully so. It is in shallow relationships where this type of cancer is born because no one wants the spotlight to shine on their own lives.
But imagine a safe place, a friendship where you can really “let your hair down”. WOW! Now imagine that friend being able to provide you with more than a sounding board but being able to help you overcome – that’s a mentor!
I have been blessed in my life with many mentors – personally, professionally and spiritually and it has changed my life. It was through these relationships that I saw the grace of God firsthand, gained the knowledge that catapulted me into the next level in my career and life, and forged relationships that have brought me joy and inspiration.
There is no greater feeling than to share your failure or lack of knowledge with someone else and having that person look you in the eye (without judgment) and say, “let’s figure this out together…” It causes you to rise. You begin to understand that you are worth it. You feel valued because someone else believes in you. And as a result you begin to accomplish more than you ever imagined you could because you have someone in your corner that is holding you accountable and expecting the best for you.
And they know you – the real you. Not the person that you project to a room full of people because you are “faking it till you make it”. No. They see your flaws and believe in you because of not in spite of who you really are. And it is in this relationship that we soar. It is the characteristic of God expressed on earth. And as a result we believe in ourselves. Then we go out and duplicate what we’ve experienced in the lives of others. Now imagine a world where each of us started creating our own small “ripple effect”. The tide would soon come in.
